I have been, at best, sporadic in posting to ROW 80 the past month or so. I have as well had limited success with my goals, especially writing ones, which has also made me reluctant to post as well. A vicious cycle.
I had not planned to post yesterday, but reading Margo L. Dill’s post today, featured on WOW! (the Women on Writing blog) resonated deeply and I had to respond. Her first words had me hooked: “What’s the problem? Life is the problem.” She stressed as well that she felt she had “little direction” and was still in “survival mode” and still needs some “TLC”.
This past year and a bit has been a roller coaster of anxiety, fear, lack of faith in my writing, sadness. My husband’s health has had an enormous effect on my emotions, my routines and plans and especially on my writing. I’ve seen him through 2 surgeries, numerous visits to the hospital and long recoveries at home. He has been off work since February since his pace maker was implanted. Now he has found out it is too dangerous for him to go back to work and the company is placing him on disability til he retires in November.
Yes, that is good news as he can take the time to recover well. But we need to get better routines in place and I need to really give some priority to writing.
I have been lucky that I still have my escape of reading and creating art. That has most definitely helped. I will be attending a writing retreat for picture book writing in July and I am hoping that that will be the much needed boost to my writer’s self-esteem.
So I will go back to baby steps – try to write every day; work on revising the 3 pix books I am taking to the retreat and swim as much as I can.
Beverley A Baird 
Sometimes life just happens and there is nothing you can do about it. Sounds like you have had too much going on in the personal life, but things will settle down and you will get back into a routine. Best wishes for a productive retreat in July. Sounds like you need it.
Thanks Chris. i appreciate your well wishes.
I’m so sorry you’ve had challenges, and happy your husband’s health is improving, albeit slowly. And I’m thrilled you’re taking baby steps. You can make a lot of progress that way.
Keep creating, and loving, and stepping1
Thanks Shan. I ‘ve hated the lack of confidence that seems to have taken hold – that my writing isn’t good enough. But baby steps will work in the long run.